


Scars

by BigMammaLlama5, MicheTS



Series: PRAU: A Carmilla Pacific Rim Adventure [4]
Category: Carmilla - J. Sheridan Le Fanu
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 02:49:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4689602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigMammaLlama5/pseuds/BigMammaLlama5, https://archiveofourown.org/users/MicheTS/pseuds/MicheTS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Laura contemplates Carmilla's past</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scars

Laura woke up like she did most mornings these days, tangled up in Carmilla. Carmilla, as per usual, was dead to the world. Laura yawned and blinked a few times, her eyes adjusting to the low light in their bunk. Exhausted and sore, she stretched the little she could without disturbing her slumbering co-pilot. Laura took in the now familiar smell of Carmilla's hair, the coolness of her skin against her own, felt Carmilla breathing out across her collar bone, the weight of her head on her chest, her body half lying on her, half off.

A lazy and content grin spread across her face, this was the happiest she'd felt in her whole life. Carmilla's arm was stretched out across her waist, her right hand holding on to Laura's left, almost as if she was a little scared Laura was going to disappear in the night. This was mostly always how they slept in one of their tiny single bunks now.

Laura started to think about the scars on Carmilla's body and the stories they told. She thought about her own, the appendix removal scar on her stomach - so normal. A small scar on her shoulder from when she was a kid and clumsily fell off a stool on to the sharp corner of a coffee table. The usual bumps and scars a Ranger picks up in training or the battlefield. Jaegers were killing machines, all sharp edges and metal. They weren't made for comfort, nor were their drift suits. Every pilot had rough callouses on their elbows and knees where the suits would chafe.

She thought about how those marks were nothing compared to the scars on Carmilla's body. The map of a singular moment in her life she would never be allowed to forget no matter how much she'd like to. It was a testament to Carmilla's resilience and ability to compartmentalise that she was still a jaeger pilot at all. Laura wasn't sure she could ever get back in the cockpit if she had been in Carmilla's place.

Laura absentmindedly ghosted the fingers of her right hand along the hexagonal scarring on Carmilla's shoulder and continued the trail down her back as she thought about the first time Carmilla had let her see her. All of her.

That night that when they...Laura wanted to say made love, but that term was even too sickly sweet for her. Consummated their relationship wasn’t applicable because of the night they got drunk and tumbled into bed with one another and fucked was just way too crass for her liking. Always had been.

But regardless of what you wanted to call it, that night, for the first time since they met, Carmilla's cocky front had dropped fully and Laura couldn’t help but think about how vulnerable Carmilla had looked. How she had tried not to stare or make Carmilla feel uncomfortable. How Carmilla had inadvertently taken a small step back when Laura had reached out to gently put her hand on Carmilla's scarred shoulder.

Laura had changed tack and instead put her hand under Carmilla's chin, tilting her head up to make her look her in the eye, much like Carmilla had done that first time they kissed. She had lent forward and kissed Carmilla gently at first and then with more urgency, trying not to babble about how beautiful she thought Carmilla really was. For once she wanted to convey how she was feeling through actions rather than words.  There weren’t really any words in the world that would soothe the scarring that ran the length of Carmilla's left hand side, Laura knew that, but somehow she had thought that maybe her lips could. 

 

She broke for air and gently kissed her way across the scarring on Carmilla's collarbone and shoulder. Placing her hands firmly on Carmilla's hips, her thumbs fitting into the grooves like they belonged there, Laura had anchored her in place. She knew Carmilla's instinct was to bolt from such intimacy. She'd been inside her head often enough now.

Holding her steady Laura had dropped to her knees, pushing Carmilla’s tank top up as she went, tracing the scarring on Carmilla's torso with her lips. Taking her time and being as gentle as she could, Laura kissed a trail to Carmilla's outer thigh were the scarring ended. Laura was trying her hardest to blink back the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.

 

 

"Hey," Carmilla said groggily, lifting her head and breaking Laura from her thoughts, bringing her back to the present moment.

"Hey," Laura replied kissing her good morning.

"What're you thinking about?" Carmilla asked as she blinked the sleep from her eyes.

"How I think I really love you Duck," Laura replied, blushing a little at the admission.

A wide, sleepy grin spread across Carmilla's face, "I think I really love you too, Goose." She lay her head back against Laura's chest and listened to the steady rhythm of her heartbeat. They didn't have to get up, not quite yet.

 


End file.
